my dirty little secret

BLAH.

Tue, 13 May 2008 04:50:29 GMT

Work is annoying the ever living piss out of me. I'm "HBC/GM manager" right? No, wrong. First of all.. I'm apparently only a "clerk"... which means I can't get a raise even though I'm ordering/putting in new items/building displays for HBC/GM WHILE throwing frozen and grocery stock out 3 days a week.. which leaves me in "my" dept for TWO days. I do more work in one day than other people do in a week.. BUT I DIGRESS.. that's not why I'm pissed.

I'm pissed because someone either store level or corporate level decided that GM (which is all seasonal stuff.. christmas/halloween/summer... plus mops/rubbermaid/school supplies/pots + pans etc...) sales should go under the GROCERY department. Now, work wise.. nothing is changing for me. I'm still doing the work.. but I'm not getting credit for the sales. Seasonal sales are the only things that brings LOTS of money to my dept.. so now all I have is toothpaste/pain meds/cold meds/vitamins/etc to bring sales in. Those sales don't vary on impulse buys. People aren't going to buy deodorant if they aren't out of deodorant.

What really pisses me off about it is that, on paper, my job is no longer a full time 40 hour-a-week job... so if hour cuts come down.. I will possibly be affected. It just pisses me off to know I work so hard for NOTHING. I don't even know if any of this makes sense, just know it sucks. I do the work, another dept gets the credit, and when it boils down to it... I could get affected by labor cuts because I'm just a "clerk," not a manger.

Mark is here, and he's not helping the situation at all.

p.s. Galaxy Quest is my new favorite movie. I NEED to get it on DVD, pronto.

p.s.s. The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas is an amusing movie, but I think I need to let it grow on me. It's a musical, so I figure in about 2 weeks I'll be madly in love with it.

p.s.s.s. OH KIT YOU'LL LOVE THIS!! Angela's mom got a new laptop, but Angela's mom didn't want me to touch it because she was afraid I'd hack into her bank account. wtf? (I had to put some freeware antivirus/antispyware stuff on it and Limewire and Photoshop for Angela)... but... srsly... HACK HER BANK ACCOUNT JUST BY USING HER COMPUTER? Come on.

Random collection of thoughts:

Wed, 23 Apr 2008 03:22:58 GMT

A: I want to be married. I don't want the whole dating thing. Sure, it's fun.. but the instability of it makes me a nervous wreck. Let's just get settled, and married, and happily ever after. (I'd give anything for a relationship like your's Kit. It's fun AND stable at the same time. That'd be ideal, but if I had to choose one or the other.. I'd pick stable and content (note! not UNHAPPY. I don't want to be like the jaded old people who HATE their spouses) over new and exciting.)

B: I'm prejudiced against the ghetto/gangsta/whatever group. (note: not all black either, lots of other races fit in this group.) It just seems like things go from FUN to "WHAT DID YOU SAY?!" in an instant. With most people, there seems to be warning signs.. or someone will outright say "You crossed the line." etcetc... but with the whole "RESPECT" mindset, it seems like it goes straight to violence. That scares the shit out of me. I'm afraid I'll make a smartass comment (which I'm known for, but they're all in good fun) and get shot/slapped/punched/etc. Scary.

C: Even though I consider myself bisexual, I'm kinda against dating other bisexual girls.. and really turned off to the idea of dating bisexual guys. I'm not sure why. I think the stereotype of bisexuals just being SLUTS is SO ingrained in my mind that I can't shake it... even though I know I can't be the ONLY bisexual not like that.

C-2: Kinda like the whole party scene and weed thing. Not EVERYONE who likes to have a good time once in a while (whether it's getting high or getting WASTED) is a horrible person. They're not all irresponsible, losers, etcetc... but on personals sites.. when I see someone mention partying/weed I get SO turned off. Even if everything else about them is perfect.. I just skip to the next person.

D: Patches was brought to the pound, and I assume put to sleep. (I like to think they rehabilitated him or sent him to a foster home.. but that's probably just wishful thinking on my part.) I don't regret it, because he wasn't in his right frame of mind and if I'm ever that disturbed in the head, I hope someone puts me out of MY misery too. He wasn't eating, and he was constantly on edge/aggressive. Although it killed me, I think I made the right decision. I have learned to get my cat put on anxiety medication if she starts to show signs of distress. I am 110% sure that his problems stemmed from Angela leaving and him being distraught. I just waited too long to do anything about it. It got way too far out of control and there was no bringing him back. THAT is what I regret. (Not that it matters, but my parents wouldn't have let me keep him anyway... so regardless of my decision, he would've been sent away.)

E: I got a new 5 month old kitten, named Chloe. I adore her. If I could have a mentally sound Patches instead, I would... but she's the bees knees. I hope she grows up to be a lapcat, but I'll love her either way.

F: Work is cool, but is about to become really lame. We're starting to get shippers (those cardboard displays) sent to us again... which basically boils down to ENTIRELY too much product for the shelf space we have. It's going to be a pain trying to keep the quantities of things they send under control. (when it was sav-a-center.. Jose had 15 shippers of toothpaste in the back. ALL OF THE SAME KIND. For some reason, corporate seems to think we sell a lot of it.)

G: The only person who has messaged me on okcupid so far, since I've started being really active there... has been a blind man. That is not a good thing for my self-esteem. I reallly don't consider myself that ugly, but I guess I'm wrong.

H, I, J: My room is clean! It's amazing. I'm in love with October Fall. New favorite band! I don't think I have anything else to mention.

Toodles.

Cat Woes.

Tue, 08 Apr 2008 13:22:13 GMT

So last night was pretty traumatizing.

Patches was in full, eyes dilated, back arched, crazy cat hissing/screaming/attacking mode last night for 5 hours, from 9 til I went to bed at 2AM.

He was sleeping in the shower-bathroom (which is right outside my door) when I got out of the bathtub-bathroom (which is in my parents' room.) I walked into my room to put my dirty clothes out, and when I left and looked in the bathroom I said "Hey Petey pete" all sweetly.. and he just flipped out and starting growling/hissing advancing. I was chased down the hall to the front room.. where I jumped on the sofa and threw a pillow at him. That put made him run back down the hall towards my room, which gave me enough time to run in my mom+dad's other bedroom door, and shut it. (They have one door right across the hall from me, and one that leads into the front room.) The whole time I'm in the room, he's growling and hissing.

I cracked open the hall enterance, and I saw him back arched by my room enterance. I sprayed him like 4,000 times with my mom's hair-water bottle and he finally ran in my room, under the bed.. Still growling. I hurried up and shut my bedroom door, and figured maybe he just needed time to snap out of whatever mood he was in. I left him mostly alone for the next half hour, just standing by the door and calling his name every once in a while... which I was answered with more growling/warning meowing. I figured maybe he wanted wet food, because the last few times he's been like this.. I've given him wet food and although he was still cautious, he wasn't ATTACKING anymore.

So, I pushed some under the door, and he ate some of it.. and when I tried to open the door a few minutes later.. he was still in the same condition. Still full fledged charging the door to try and get to me mode. I was panicked and really shooken up. It scares me/breaks my heart when he's acting like this... and besides that, my phone, work clothes, shoes, were in the bedroom and I needed to get to them for work the next day. I opened the door and grabbed my phone off the desk, barely closing it before he got there, and just started bawling. I rotated between bawling and being severely pissed off for the rest of the night. I had an idea to try to get him in the bathroom.. so I opened a can of tuna and made a trail from the door to the shower (which is a walk in shower) with the plate at the end. I hid in my mom's room and waited, and he eventually went in the bathroom... I hurried up and closed the door with him in it. I'd call his name every now and then, which I got more growling and hissing as a response. It's about 10ish right now.

I kept him in there for about an hour or so, and then I got the idea that maybe he should just go outside for a little while.. I took a chance, and opened the door and he was hidden behind the toilet, not coming when I called but still with eyes dilated and that LOOK in his eyes, ears back. I closed it again, went to the front door and opened it.. then went to the bathroom door, cracked it, and ran into the kitchen... hidden with a pillow in hand so I could make a quick getaway if he came to me. I watched him come out the bathroom, eyes sweeping the area like he was looking for something to attack.. he went outside and I figured "Okay, maybe he's better?" so I grabbed a cigarette to go outside and smoke with him (like we usually do) Nope, whatever is in him that's wrong snaps again.. and he starts charging the door when he sees me coming outside.. so I close the door, and go smoke in the backyard.

It's around 11:30ish now, and I keep poking my head out the window, calling his name.. and i keep getting hiss/growl/meows as a response. I call my dad, leave a message to tell him to be careful coming home (He gets home at 1:30) because Patches has fucking snapped, or something. I poke my head outside around 12, and call his name and don't get a hiss for a reply. I figure that's a good sign.. so I risk walking out all the way.. Down the street, I hear a cat fight going on.. and I figure he was part of it... so I'm shining the flashlight down the street and I see another cat walking away. I'm half tempted to go closer, but I figure I don't want to be in the middle of the street with my psycho attack cat.. so i just go back inside. I poke my head out literally 2 minutes later and he's walking back.. tail still fully puffed, so I figured it was him (Guess he got his ass kicked!) I searched him the best I could with the flashlight, from inside a door, about 5 feet away from him for any signs of blood/anything. Didn't see anything, so I figured he was ok.

So from 12-1:30 when my dad gets home... he's by the front door, not letting me out.. probably wanting to come in.. but I'm not about to risk getting attacked by letting him in and getting chased into some room where he stands guard and I'm trapped in there.. so I left him outside. I kept opening the door and checking, and he was still hissing/growling/reowing whenever I did that.

My dad gets home, and while the cat didn't charge him.. he wasn't backing down either. My dad ended up coming in through the backdoor instead of having the cat attack him and him having to kick his head in self-defense... and when I last checked at 2AMish, he was still snapped. I can't find him outside this morning, so I don't know where he is or what's happened to him.

I varied between "god I wish he'd just die" rage last night to "I wish he'd just get better." bawling. I cannot keep him as a pet like this, regardless of what some of my friends think. It is not a matter of using positive reinforcement or training, or plastic bags/spray bottles to discipline him. He was NOT backing down, and nothing was changing his mind. This is not just an instance of an asshole cat. My cat's always been an asshole, taking a swipe at your legs and running away, or biting you for no reason. I've dealt with him as an asshole.

This is him as a crazed mother fucker. He should not be around ANY human like this. I don't have an extra bedroom with a door I can push cat food in. Or a full out riot suit to change his litter box in. He has to live with me, or moreorless, he has to die. He's not an adoptable cat. It is not acceptable, for even the most craziest of cat ladies, for a cat to be in full feral, rip your throat out, ATTACK mode at the drop of a hat, without provoking. If I had thrown something at him, and he retaliated.. for a half hour.. That'd be acceptable. This is just insane.

Besides, regardless of whether I can deal with him.. no one else in my family can run and jump on a sofa, or run AT ALL. If he is like this towards ANY of them.. They're gonna get hurt, maybe severely. I can't have that on my shoulders. AND my sister-in-law is having a baby in July. I can't risk him being a toddler, opening the door to my room and having my cat full fledged attack him.

If this was a human, attacking other humans with a full RAGE.. He'd be a: shot dead while he was trying to attack people or b: stuck in a full bind body straight jacket, and put in some rubber room. They don't have an equivalent for cats. It's called putting to sleep.

I don't have any other options. If I get him declawed, I can't ever put him outside when he gets like this. If I go to the vet to get anti-anxiety medicine... There's no way I can give it to him. If I leave him as an outside cat, I have to risk getting attacked leaving or entering my own house. What other choice do I have but to get him taken away? I don't see any other logical choices. Besides, isn't it better to have him put to sleep rather than have him get hit by a car, or shot at with b-bs/tortured by some stupid neighborhood kid, or kicked to death by some family who's cat/kids he's attacking? It's like the only way I could keep him is if I had a closet full of tranquilizer darts, and whenever he got like this.. I knocked him out, locked him in a cage until he got better. (and can you see him calming down while locked in a cage?)

and Kit, I know you disagree with me on this. I know you do. If I get him put to sleep, you'll probably never talk to me again, but god I think if you had seen him you'd at least understand a little.

dear world.

Fri, 28 Mar 2008 01:30:05 GMT

LISTENING TO HATEBREED MAKES MY THROAT HURT.

Seriously. I don't think that's normal.

I'm not screaming along, so whyyyyyy?!?!

p.s. THIS LADY IS LUCKY I'M ANAL.

(she has mix cds.. and I'm listening to the songs so I can get them labeled correctly.)

I AM NOT YOUR TECH SUPPORT.

Fri, 28 Mar 2008 01:00:15 GMT

I think I need younger friends. All of my "adult" (I say that like I'm not an adult. doh!) friends have no or very little of a clue about computers... and at least ONCE A DAY I have to fix a computer at work, or show them how to do something, or fix the scanning/ordering/pricing gun.

And then there's the endless "Oh I'm gonna call you and you can walk me through putting songs on my ipod" etc etc.

This one lady, in seafood, says she has an ipod that's just sitting there because "there's a password on my computer that doesn't let me download music to it"

.... SO HERE I AM, in my free time.. ripping ALL of her CDs to her ipod.

GODDAMMIT. I should start charging extra.

It's not my fault that cell phones don't have away messages!

Thu, 20 Mar 2008 03:01:39 GMT

Intro: Get a phone call from a friend at around 2:30. Was in the shitter (not that I'm going to tell him that.. lol) so I didn't answer. I knew he had work at 3, and I hate it when people call me at work so I just let it go. He goes home at lunch and signs on AIM.. following conversation ensues.

Spifferific = me

friend (6:17:55 PM): thanks for answering the phone i appreciate it
spifferific (6:18:35 PM): You really need to get over that. [he wigs out like this all the time] I don't answer my phone every time someone calls. It's called not feeling like talking. It's normal.
friend (6:18:58 PM): at least you could text? [and why couldn't HE text me and ask say what he needed to?]
friend (6:19:09 PM): or answer and say hey what do you need i dont feel like talking
friend (6:19:36 PM): not just not answer the phone
friend (6:19:40 PM): i mean what if it was a emergency
spifferific (6:19:51 PM): What could i possibly do for you in an emergency?
boy (6:19:56 PM): call for help

CALL FOR HELP!?! wtf. I don't drive. There is NOTHING I could do for him in an emergency. I don't know any of his friends, or his family.. so it's not like I could get in touch with them. So.. WHY would he call ME in an emergency? Instead of calling for help HIMSELF?

friend (6:20:24 PM): and the reason i called is because were suppose to be friends
friend (6:20:30 PM): i bet if angela called you would answer [Angela is my ex-girlfriend, and we're still pretty close. And no, I don't always answer for her EITHER]
friend (6:20:34 PM): thats messed up

What's wrong with just not wanting to talk? Why are people INSULTED nowadays when someone doesn't answer their phone? or call them back within 10 minutes? ESPECIALLY if they don't leave a voice mail.

If you don't leave a voice mail or even send a text saying "hey call when you get a chance"... I assume it's not anything important, and therefore won't call you back if I am not in the mood.

Am I really that horrible of a person for having this outlook?

p.s. This was originally posted in my postwhore thread, then expanded for a full rant at xmike, then revised for here. :D

Consider me AMUSED

Wed, 19 Mar 2008 22:57:56 GMT

I was outside smoking... and there was a man walking a tiny dog and he singing at the TOP OF HIS LUNGS, completely oblivious to anything around him.

It made me giggle.

.

surveys are for pussies.

Mon, 10 Mar 2008 06:07:13 GMT

1. Alright, so have you ever actually sat down and thought about why you like the person you like? Not really, mainly because there's no ONE person I "like" right now. As far as friends like... Most of my friends are either funny or find me funny. That is the common denominator with everyone. Humor is fucking key.

2. When people say, "Honestly, I don't think I've ever talked bad about anyone," do you think it's possible? I have only met ONE single person in my life who I never, ever heard say a negative word about ANYONE. That's Rod Archie. Whenever I'd try to talk bad about someone, he'd have a "Well, that's just their thing." sorta response. Someone could call him a f-cking n-gger (He was black, obviously) and he wouldn't get mad. His feeling was that everyone had a right to think and do what they want... He's the only person I could believe "never talked bad about anyone."

3. How do you feel about gay marriage? It's gay.

4. Is there someone you really like to hang out with and just talk about stuff? Pretty much every single one of my friends. I'm not much of a "Let's go out and DO something" kinda gal. If I can't hold a conversation with you without us DOING something, you're not worth my time.

5. Is there something that has happened in your past that you really hate talking about? Nothing really. I'm pretty much an open book.

6. Do you think a lot of people think bad things about you? I hope not. I try to stay out of people's way and off their bad sides. If anything, maybe people talk about how weird I am.

7. Give me some of the lyrics from the song you're listening to: "Mr. Blue, I told you that I love you. Please believe me."

8. Do you think you're approachable? I try to be really goofy and easy-going, but I think I might come off as fucking annoying sometimes. :D.. but I don't think people are scared of me. I'm not intimidating.

10. Do you regret doing anything this week? This week? Uhm, not really. I had a pretty good week. :)

11. What are your plans for the weekend? Working on Saturday. Playing video games on Sunday. lol. THE NORMAL.

12. When did you last cry? Tonight. Extreme Home Makeover gets me every time.

13. How late did you stay up last night? I think it was 11 or 12ish when I stopped playing guitar hero with Thomas. He called me a pussy. :P

14. Has someone of the opposite sex ever told you they loved you,and meant it? Probably not. Besides friends or family.

15. What do you think of the most when you are alone? Any and everything. From Angela to random friends, to work, to the sky being blue...

16. Suppose you see your crush kissing another person. Well, they are a couple. It's expected.

17. What would you do if a teacher of the opposite sex hit on you? Depends on how compatible we were, and the age difference.

18. Would you ever become a vegetarian? I don't see me having REAL trouble with it.. if say a significant other never cooked meat... I wouldn't do it voluntarily though.

19. Do you like your school? The school of HBC/GM!! GOOO GROCERY BUSINESS!

20. What do you think of people who hate vegetarians? For every hamburger you don't eat, I'm going to eat THREE! (I really think biased, unreasonable hate is stupid on so many levels. Whether it's based on religion, sexual preference, or eating habits.. )

21. Are you a flirt? I would be, if I had talent at it.

22. Would you rather have jet black hair or cherry red hair? I'd rather have jet black with cherry red streaks. I've always wanted that... (but if I have to pick one, then black)

23. Do you make sexual innuendos about everything? I'd like to stick my sexual in your innuendo, baby!

24. Who sits behind you in science? .... Mr. Ed. Yep, the talking horse.

25. What song are you listening to? Now? It's Rocketship by Shiny Toy Guns

26. Have you ever held hands? Not as much as I'd like to have...

27. When was the last time that you went swimming, where, and what color was your swim suit? Sometime last year, Pensacola Beach, FL, and I had men's swimming trunks, a sports bra, and a tank top on... all navy blue.

29. If you need a new pair of jeans, what store do you go to first? Lane Bryant

30. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? Depends on who with, usually I turn red regardless (unless I'm talking to Angela.. but that might change in the near future as we grow farther apart.)

32. Did you ever lose a best friend? I've lost a few, but not in the "I FUCKINGHATEYOU" way, more the "we grew apart, that sucks" way.

33. Have you ever gotten mad because somebody said they'd call you and they didn't? Call? No. Pick me up so we can go somewhere? Hell yes.

34. Have you ever met a real life prostitute? Maybe? But I just didn't know it? They walk the streets and look like NORMAL people sometimes!!

35. Have you ever kissed in the rain? I wish.. :(

36. Can you do push-ups? The sissy girl ones.

37. Has anyone got on your nerves lately? Of course. I work in retail, duh.

38. Do you think you will be married in 10 years? I HOPE.

39. What were you doing at 6pm Friday night? Huh? I don't know what I was doing YESTERDAY at 6pm.

40. Do you know anyone with the same name as you? I went to high school with someone with my name, same spelling and everything.. but no one now.

Consider me a PUBLISHED poet. (again) haha

Mon, 10 Mar 2008 03:38:31 GMT

http://consumerist.com/365578/geek-squads-abominable-service-inspires-poem

AWESOME.

The number FOUR

Wed, 05 Mar 2008 05:51:23 GMT

Four jobs I have had in my life
1. babysitter/grass cutter/anything that's not really a job.
2. Albertson's: Shopping cart getter + Cashier
3. Sav-A-Center: USCAN overseer, scanning, HBC clerk then manager, anything else they could think of.
4. Rouse's: HBC Manager > HBC Assistant Manager > HBC Manager again

(Need I remind you that I have not left the same physical location for the last three jobs. haha)

Four movies I would watch over and over
1. Hairspray (11 times in theatres!)
2. Hairspray (a billion times on DVD! hence it taking up two spots)
3. SWEENEY TODD!!!!!!
4. Music & Lyrics

(this is in order of most recent obsessions. I pretty much obsess over every movie I've ever liked.)

Four places I have lived.
1. My house.
2. Brother's apartment (Maybe 6 months? then I moved back with the 'rents)
3. Hope, Arkansas (for a month, after Katrina)
4. Rental house (after Hope, for a year, and then back to my house)

Four TV shows i watch
1. Extreme Home Makeover (ABC)
2. CSI.. Las Vegas, Miami and/or New York (on every channel, ever)
3. Dirty Jobs + Mythbusters (Discovery)
4. John and Kate Plus 8 + Little People, Big World (TLC)

Four places I have been:
1. CLEVELAND, OHIO (KIT IS THE AWESOME)
2. Pensacola, FL (with Angela)
3. Orlando, FL (grad nite)
4. Gulfport, MS (Stayed the night at the casino a few times..)

(these are places I've gone without my family on a vacation type thing)

People who e-mail me (regularly)
1. Mary (old boss)
2. Erica (current co-worker)
3. Jevon (although her emails are sporadic, she's the only other human who emails me)
4. ENTER NEWSLETTER I'M SUBSCRIBED TO HERE

Four of my favorite foods:
1. French Fries
2. Cotton Candy
3. Carrots
4. Animal Crackers

Four places I would rather be right now:
1. Uh...
2.
3.
4.

Four Things I am looking forward to this year:
1. Getting a raise (hopefully!)
2. Learning to drive (probably won't happen)
3. Being an aunt!
4. Winning mucho money at the casino!

blahblahshouldn'tcareaboutwhatpeopleonlinethinkblah

Mon, 25 Feb 2008 06:35:38 GMT

Why is it that people seem to sense when I am at my most vulnerable and choose THEN to be total fucking dickwads, when during the other 99% of my online life EVERY SINGLE PERSON I talk to/encounter online is either nice, or obviously joking/trying to get a laugh?

You know, I always said I'd rather be smart than ugly, but lately I just don't know anymore. I think I'd trade it away in a heartbeat.

Edit: And Angela WONDERS why I don't go "looking" for new friends/relationship people. Every time I message or comment on some random person's profile/whatever... I get ignored/insulted.

My BEST BEST friendships have come from random encounters usually initiated by THEM. Robyn, Kit, Katie, Angela, Abbra, Jenn, Yesenia... (Even Stephanie, Lauren, Jessie, Kasey and other important people from my past). All of these were people that I didn't try to start a conversation/friendship with (it just happened).. and the majority of them messaged ME first OUT OF THE BLUE.

(Linz being the only expection, but to be QUITE honest, I never imagined we'd be this good of friends when I messaged her the first time. Ever.)

Editted Edit: (I posted this to myspace and added/deleted some stuff and I thought it made a better sounding entry so I changed this one up too.)

I find this hilarious

Fri, 22 Feb 2008 04:47:01 GMT

So sad, SO SAD!

Fri, 22 Feb 2008 04:01:22 GMT

The boss who I've been working for my entire "working life" is being transferred to a store in New Orleans. :( (which SUCKS for him. It's in the GHETTO) I don't want to work for anyone else! This succckkkkksss.

:(

How embarrassing...

Thu, 21 Feb 2008 00:43:05 GMT

So I work at a grocery store, and our breakroom/office is upstairs. My boss is an older woman, who at the end of the day has trouble getting up the steps. We CONSTANTLY poke fun at each other.. so today I started crawling on all fours up the steps while she was walking up them. (and I was going faster too!)

But WHO starts coming up the steps behind us? Our store manager (who is a really nice guy who would've probably laughed at me)? Noo of course not!! It was our DISTRICT MANAGER. Oh my god. Haha. I felt like SUCH AN ASS.

But it's good to know that on those surveys that ask for your "most embarrassing moment."... I'll have something to put now!

Googlisms

Wed, 20 Feb 2008 03:28:10 GMT

How well does Google know you? Find out.

Here's how it works:

Type your first name and a present tense verb into Google. Make sure you use quotes around the entire phrase! Then post the first relevant result result you find. That's it! You'd be surprised to find out how many people with your name have similar likes/dislikes/problems as you.

Example:
Search Term: "Joey wants"
Result: "Joey wants to become the Donald Trump of the Eastern Shore"

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Your name: Kristi

Is...
Kristi is screaming and laughing and crying, one outburst after the other.
(Not literally, but I've been extremely mood swingy lately.)

Wants...
Kristi wants to see if cattle will eat a “cowpie."
(Well.. now that you mention it...)

Needs...
Kristi needs to get out of the house more.
(Ain't THAT the truth?!)

Loves...
Kristi Loves the Mud.
(I am rather partial to the way mud feels betweens my toes.)

Hates...
Kristi hates Aunt Flo.
(Who the hell likes it?)

Best Buy? WORST BUY!

Fri, 15 Feb 2008 04:50:00 GMT

Best Buy? WORST BUY!
A Poem by Kristi Lynn Cobbler

So listen to a story bout a gal named Moo.
Her display broke and she didn't know what to do.
She took it to Best Buy to try the Geek Squad
The next month or so had her praying to God.

"It's the monitor!" They said, so sure of themselves.
So she sent it off to be fixed by the Best Buy elves.
"Come and get it!" They called! She was filled with delight.
She brings her monitor home, but something isn't right.

It's having the same problem as it had before.
They said they fixed it. They said they were sure.
Back to Best Buy! She goes in a flash.
She buys a different wire with her hard earned cash.

Hooray! It's fixed, albeit not right.
The monitor doesn't make it through the night.
In the midst of her problems, she begins to weep.
Her computer won't start. All it does is beep.

Back to Best Buy, for the third time.
She hands her computer to the Geek Squad slime.
"It just beeps at me." She says with a sigh.
And of course the Geek Squad doesn't know why.

Now her computer is sent off for repair,
as stuff piles up on her unused computer chair.
She waits and she waits for it to come back,
Before her chair turns into a clothes rack.

A phone call. "Hello?" It's about time they called.
Her computer was back, and so ass she hauled.
She drove mighty quickly to that Best Buy store.
She got her computer, and bust out the door.

Home again! Home again! She arrives in a hurry.
She has a strange feeling, and she starts to worry.
She hooks up the wires, and turns her computer on.
Hooray! It works! She could burst into song!

But that's not the end of this really long story.
The repair shop has the attention span of Dory.
All is well, or so it seems like it might be.
Until she tries to play her Sweeney Todd CD.

She ejects the tray, and pops her CD in.
She sits and she waits for the music to begin.
"What's this?" She feels as if she could bawl.
Her CD drive isn't showing up at all.

She sighs a deep sigh as she opens her case.
Then she groans when she sees what was left out of place.
Her blood boils as the repairman she wish she could diss.
It's something that not just anyone could miss.

A loose wire was hanging. Quite obviously too.
Even a small child would know what to do.
She fixes it and sets her computer back onto the shelf.
"Next time my computer is broken," she says, "I'll fix it MYSELF."

The lesson of the story is, in so many words.
Geek Squad is laughable. They're not real nerds.
So unless you feel like wishing you were dead...
Don't go to Geek Squad, find a REAL geek instead.

:( SAD EMO FACE

Mon, 11 Feb 2008 05:21:30 GMT

blahblah myspace entry

Fri, 01 Feb 2008 02:34:06 GMT

Being a hermit sucks.
Current mood: lonely

I need a car, or friends to hang out with, or a medical miracle to get over my social phobia so I can acquire thing 1 and thing 2.

I'm tired of being left home alone with nothing to do, and no one to talk to. This is starting to get fucking old.

Of course it's no one's fault but my own, as usual. Of course it's not anyone else's fault. Who in their right mind would choose to stay home with me on their days off? There's more important things to do.

son of a ....

Tue, 29 Jan 2008 00:04:39 GMT

Cloverfield made me JUMP out of my seat, BAWL like a baby and VOMIT.

holyfuckingcow.

What a movie!!! haha

That's stupid.

Fri, 18 Jan 2008 03:07:43 GMT

So, my mom went to her lawyer today and she said that my mom hardly has a chance to get disability. Apparently there's no real "proof" of anything being wrong in her back. Maybe next time she has an episode and is screaming to God for it to stop, I should video tape it and shove it down the judge's fucking eye sockets.

Bullshit.

There are people who try to scam the system, my mom is NOT one of them.

Fucking red tape. My mom must've went to the hospital twice EVEN THOUGH SHE DIDN'T HAVE INSURANCE because she liked owing tens of thousands of dollars to doctors! UGGGGGGHHHH.

IDIOTS. IDIOTS. Stupid.

"There's a hole in the world like a great black pit, and it's filled with people who are filled with shit, and the vermin of the world inhabit it, and it goes by the name of" THE AMERICAN JUDICIAL SYSTEM.

I DON'T WANNA

Sun, 13 Jan 2008 15:43:55 GMT

I don't want to clean. I don't want to clean. I don't want to clean. I DON'T WANT TO CLEAN.

::pouts::

I haven't updated this in AGES!

Sat, 16 Jun 2007 01:42:55 GMT

I moved to gj. But I don't dare delete this because of all of the memories... <3

HAPPY EASTER!!

Tue, 11 Apr 2006 03:49:48 GMT

el oh el

Mon, 16 Jan 2006 03:49:26 GMT

I joined a bowling league with my pops, my brother, and my sister in law (for those who didn't know)... and I must say that bowling alley food/beverages are the BEST! Why, today I thought my Dr. Pepper tasted EXTRA delicious.. and once I finished my drink, I found out why!

There were FLIES (or some other sort of winged bug) FROZEN INSIDE THE ICE CUBES.

Now, this picture I'm about to post is crap, but that's because it's from my camera phone and was on the lowest setting because I am, in fact, a moron... but I assure you... The black dots you see in the cup are actually little winged miracles of nature that ended up frozen inside of my ice cubes.

You can not make this kind of goodness up.

The first game I bowled, I scored a 76 (which is my lowest score ever). However, after completely consuming my buggy beverage, my scores began to increase. The next two games I bowled a 97 (5 pins above my average) and a 107 (my highest score ever). This would lead me to believe that my beetle juice affected my bowling in a positive manner, and I believe I shall request bugs in my ice from this day forward!

.

Happy New Years!

Sun, 01 Jan 2006 17:11:59 GMT

Last night was so much fun. We had the cheesiest kid set of fireworks and (I at least) had a blast! I got to spend my first New Years Eve with someone that really meant the world to, and I got my first ever New Year's Kiss. Yay! I love my Angela Perron.

Part Two: Resolutions!!

My actual, official resolutions are as follows.

1: Follow the budget I have planned out for myself.
a: $50 from each paycheck goes in my wallet and is my "allowance" for the week.
b: $50 from each paycheck goes directly into savings and is not to be touched without careful consideration.
c: $100 anything else goes into my checkings account, and at the end of each week, if I have more than $1,000 in my checkings, it will be deposited into savings, even if it's only a couple of dollars.

2: Only drink one soda a day.

Now, my unofficial resolutions are a bit more strict. See, Angela is starting on a diet, and we're going to join a gym. I told her I'd try to stick to her diet. So, my unofficial new years resolution is to stick to Angela's diet!

Okay, there's not much more to say. My house still is as gutted as ever, but there's a new roof on the house now! I miss my puppies. They've been staying at the old house. :( Boo.

HAPPY 2006 EVERYONE!